When it rears it's head, am I going backwards?

Originally posted Feb 13, 2021.

Firstly, NO! You are not going backwards at all. Your body is just giving you warning signs that you need to do something to make you feel good again.

I am so incredibly grateful that I haven't been bad or really low since this all first started. However as I'm sure most of you are feeling, 2021 maybe hasn't got off to the best of starts.

With being stuck in our homes, this is bringing back feelings to me of when I couldn't leave the house when I was signed off work nearly 2 years ago. I've noticed over the past few weeks I've been having stomach aches (which is where we hold some of our anxiety) held onto worry unnecessarily, been tired and I have been overthinking about everything.

The past few weeks there have been occasions where I have this build up of questions in my head about going outside. This isn't helped by the fact that we are told to stay and home and only go outside for 'this' reason only or 'that' reason only.

Now, I'm not here to debate about corona virus and what people think they should, can or want to do with this lockdown, BUT my point is that personally this lockdown is starting to trigger my mental health and anxieties again.

By not going outside (or only for the basics) my body has memories of when I couldn't go outside last time. Now this isn't because I don't want to (because I do!) but by being put in a situation now where we can't freely go out (and can't see friends and family like normal), this is bringing back those memories and I have been struggling to realise them.

My body has been giving me the warning signs for a few weeks now, and what have I done.. ignored them! Why?

Because for some reason, because this happened ages ago and I've been better since, I'm putting it to one side so it doesn't happen again. But but ignoring it and not addressing it, I am letting the fear of it happening again simmer.

The moral of the story is to pick up on those warning signs. It's your bodies way of telling you to stop and take a break. Instead what I have tried to do here is to power on and carry on as if all is well. Generally it is! But by ignoring those signs, it soon comes to a head again, and can be worrying for out state of mind.

So what have I done to make myself feel better?

• Meditated for 10 minutes - I found an anxiety breathing video on YouTube to help steady my breathing.

• Drank water - after all the crying I drank water to rehydrate myself.

• Made a Tea - for warmth and comfort. And also this is a small victory when we feel low. So if you make tea or coffee, tell yourself well done!

• Talked - called my step mum and spoke with my other half.

• Wrote in my journal - I scribbled down all the thoughts I was having just to get them out of my head. Which also helped me to write this blog.

So when you're having one of those moments, go to your tool box and pull out those tools that help you get through the day.

I've got this, you've got this, we've got this.

Danni